Summer has past and it feels like we are already well entrenched with fall. For some couples with custody agreements, issues about summer vacation and the summer-time holidays have been addressed. As the year progresses, however, religious holidays become the main source of contention between people. If they have not already addressed how they will divide these holidays, it can make a normally stressful time even worse as the schedules of who has the children when and whether extended families will get to see the kids, etc.

Mark Banschick, M.D. uses the celebration of Rosh Hashanah this week as a jumping off point in an article on some practical tips for dealing with the holidays.

In reality, the best way to address holidays is to have a specific schedule in place and in a Custody Order. When it comes to negotiating a schedule, however, it is important to identify what is really important to you and, particularly for religious holidays, what aspect of that holidays has meaning to you in terms of family traditions or religious upbringing for your children. If Midnight Mass is more important to you than having the kids open gifts at 5 am, then simply ask for Christmas Eve and open gifts with the kids in the afternoon on Christmas or, for that matter on Christmas Eve. Rare is the child who will object to stretching out Christmas an extra day on the front or back end.

Do not lose sight of the fact that the point of holidays is to share special time with your family. As the children grow up, it will be moments over holidays that make for long-last memories. By prioritizing what is important to you and your family, you are most likely to provide your children with positive memories from each household.